My friend Abel is single without kids. He was married once. The majority of his so called friends are married W/ kids. Most of them, at some point or another, have announced to Abel that if they weren’t married W/ kids, or single W/ kids, or homosexual W/ kids, or whomever they are pretending to be W/ kids, that they would have SO much time to [fill in the blank].
No Seriously..if they just weren’t so fucking tied up with their wife or husband, and of course the lives of their spoiled children, they would have SO much free time that they wouldn’t even know what to do with themselves.
“Fuck Abel, if I was in your shoes, my life would be so much better.”
Ha. Abel is quick to point out that these people W/ kids wouldn’t know what to do with themselves if they were in his shoes. And that’s because their day to day wouldn’t be so precisely laid out for them like it is now. Wake Up. Pat the Dog. Check the Market. Drink the Coffee. Kiss the Wife. Kiss the Kids. Work the Day. Support the kids in their Chosen After School Activity. Eat the Dinner. Drink the Beer. Kiss the Wife. Kiss the Kids. Pat the Dog, Listen to the Lies on the TV. Go to Sleep. Repeat the Day.
To Abel, that sort of lifestyle trap seems so easy that it’s almost sickening. In fact, 99 out of 100 people are doing it because it’s so fucking easy.
So to ruffle some feathers, Abel began telling all his little friends and family within his social circle that they are so far gone that if their lives were any other way, they actually wouldn’t know how to live. Take away their family and they would probably sit in the corner drinking their personal Kool-Aid while staring out to space.
Oh no, Abel is not done talking. He then goes on to tell anybody that will listen that it takes way more passion, self esteem, thought, desire, and especially creativity, to lead HIS so-called life. By no means does Abel claim that he’s better or smarter or nicer or superior to his fellow man or woman. He just doesn’t have the benefit of having to go to a Little League game or a Birthday Play Date to fill his time. Instead, he finds other ways to productively keep on keeping on.
My boy Abel then says that any-old human can have kids and become completely emeshed in their kids’ lives. Don’t get Abel wrong though. He’d be the very first person to tell you that if things had been a little different here or a tad different there, he’d be one of those humans.